As a professional coach, you have some expertise in your particular subject matter or industry: Time management, productivity, family life, business, whatever. But a lot of coaching involves psychology and helping to guide a client through the psychological complexities of the particular area you are coaching in. There is one part of coaching that we coaches face all the time which we are not really prepared to address, but which psychologists deal with frequently: Enablers.

An enabler is someone whose actions or words make it possible for your client – or even encourages them – to do something that they shouldn't do. A classic example is the parent who believes that disciplining their child will only hamper their ability to grow creatively and thus they encourage and enable their children towards bad behavior because the children crave the attention and loving guidance they need from their parents.

Your clients have enablers, too. Maybe you have a client with poor time management skills who has a friend that calls them up and needs help through crises. That friend's crises – which seem critically urgent – enable your client to put aside anything scheduled for the seemingly more important crisis. Or maybe you have a client who is scared to sell and has come to you for help. Perhaps they have a friend who is also a weak salesperson and has a million reasons ("excuses") why their sales are not very good. 

Spotting these enablers is not easy and breaking their hold on your client is even harder. These enablers are often people who are very close to your client and who are highly trusted. And their advice seems to your client like very wise advice. To spot these enablers, talk to your clients about the times that they want to do something but don't and listen for the same names to come up again and again. Obviously the mere mention of the name isn't an indicator itself, so you need to find out who your client is close to and explore the impact they have on your client's ability to act: How do those friends influence a client. Remember: An enabler will be perceived to be a positive influence on a client's life even though their enabling is often having a negative consequence.

Dealing with these enablers. You won't be successful at dealing with these enablers by telling your client that their friends are enablers. In fact, you'll probably drive clients away. Instead, you should help them to create boundaries and a framework of responses and reactions when an enabler guides them incorrectly. Help them to trust themselves first and foremost and to build a filter through which they accept all advice. 

For example, in the time management situation mentioned above, you might consider helping your client to find ways of saying "I can't speak right now. Can we talk later?" Or in the sales example, consider showing your client how their own successes aren't matching with what their friend is saying.

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Several years ago I was in a business coaching group. There were a number of us – maybe 12 or so? – who would gather for weekly meetings and talk about our businesses while networking. One day, the session opened with the group leader asking us to describe our business experience while using the analogy of a roller coaster. So some people talked about Ferris Wheels and some people talked about Merry-Go-Rounds, and I sat there with a bad attitude, rolling my eyes and asking myself "why did I pay to do this?"

Years later, my thoughts have changed on the matter. Although I think that the roller coaster analogy itself may have been weak (and the leader never did anything with it beyond asking us to describe our experience), I've come to realize the value of the analogy in general.

An analogy is when we describe something and show how it is similar (analogous) to something else. Analogies help us to clarify our thoughts, put words to our feelings and to analyze situations. 

Clarifying our thoughts

Sometimes we can get so caught up in a particular moment that we lose sight of its true importance (or we get stressed out about it even though it is totally unimportant) and an analogy can help to clarify what we are thinking. Sometimes there are so many things to think about in one given moment that we lose sight of the one thing that needs to be thought about.

Put words to our feelings

Sometimes a situation is so complex that it begins to feel insurmountable and we can become overwhelmed with it. The more complex it becomes, the harder it is for us to know how we feel about it and that not only stresses us out but it also causes us to stop acting. Analogies help us to express what we feel, particularly at times when we can't express it with more conventional "I'm sad" or "I'm scared."

Analyze situations

As mentioned, sometimes a situation is complex that we don't know what we are going to do. A analogy helps us to figure out (even in a slightly imperfect way) what the situation really is like and that helps to put us on a path towards figuring out a solution.

If you're not using analogies in your practice, you may want to think about starting. They are a great way to get the conversation going and to get clients unstuck.

A few things you should know about analogies:

* Analogies will always be imperfect. There is never an exactly comparable analogy. Your job isn't to highlight how an analogy is flawed but rather to explore how the client sees the analogy as comparable and why they chose that particular analogy.

* When asking clients to give an analogy, give them some parameters. Don't just say: "give me an analogy" but rather ask them to give you an analogy within a certain definition. The roller coaster is on example. Or you might say, "Imagine that you are an animal. What animal would you be? Why? What animal would your competitors be? Why?" You should try to pick an analogy type that your clients find engaging. (A person with an interest in aircraft, for example, might be interested in creating analogies about how his or her business is like a particular airplane).

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We’re not here to make a decision for you. Instead, this information is presented to help you make up your own mind. These pros and cons contain observations we’ve made in our years of coaching.

Virtual Coaching
This is where you meet a potential client through a communication channel (perhaps an online medium or simply over the phone).

Pros:
* You can meet with anyone, no matter where they are.
* The tools today are inexpensive (i.e. Webex) or even free (i.e. Skype).
* Many people coach virtually so it’s not an unusual proposition.
* We’ve found that people are generally on-time for virtual coaching more often than they are with face-to-face coaching.
* You can stack your meetings one after the other.

Cons:
* Some would say that you cannot make a true connection with someone without meeting them face to face.
* Potential technological malfunctions can disrupt the coaching time.

Face-to-Face Coaching
This is where you and your client meet in person.

Pros:
* You can build rapport a little more quickly and use visual cues (such as body language) to help you understand your client.
* You always choose to continue alternate your coaching between in-person and virtual.

Cons:
* You are limited to a market who can travel to see you (or whom you travel to see).
* You may be required to have your own office if that’s where people meet.
* Your marketing may need to include local channels (which can cost more).
* We’ve found that people are generally on-time for virtual coaching more often than they are with face-to-face coaching.
* There is sometimes travel time in between each meeting.

I’m sure we’ve missed some important points. So please feel free to add your own ideas in the comments section. And tell us, do you prefer one over the other?

Brought to by you by: Contemporary VA - Run your business instead of running in circles.

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But there is a tool that is extremely helpful, no matter kind of coaching you do. This tool can help any coach. It’s the SWOT analysis.

SWOT analysis stands for Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities, and Threats and it has been an integral part of the business world since the dawn of time. (Or, at least it seems that way).

To perform a SWOT analysis, simply take a regular sheet of paper and fold it into quarters. Then in each quarter right one of the words – Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities, Threats – so you have all four on the page.

Now it’s time to analyze. To do this well, it’s best to first clearly define what you are analyzing. If you’re a business coach, you might be helping your client analyze an entire business or a market segment or the competition or a new product or a new joint venture. If you’re a relationship coach, you might be helping your client analyze a recent date they went on or how they view themselves. If you’re a productivity coach, you might be helping your client analyze their schedules or a recent project they started. You need to clearly define what you are analyzing or else the analysis can carry on too long and get out of hand.

Start with strengths. These are the internal strengths of the situation – perhaps of the person or the business, if that’s what you’re analyzing.

Then move on to weaknesses. These are the internal weaknesses of the situation.

Next, move on to opportunities. These are the external elements that can be used to improve the situation.

Last, work on threats. These are the external elements that risk the failure of the situation.

Often, for people new to the SWOT analysis, strengths and opportunities often get repeated, and weaknesses and threats often get repeated. However, they are different: Strengths and weaknesses are internal while opportunities and threats are external.

Take as much time as you need on this part for the more it’s filled in, the more useful it will be in the next step:

Next, start making connections and leverage what’s there. Use the following questions to help you:

1. Are there strengths that can be used to minimize weaknesses?
2. Are there strengths that can be used to leverage opportunities?
3. Are there strengths that can be used to mitigate threats?
4. What weaknesses are real problems and what weaknesses are minor?
5. How can these weaknesses be resolved, strengthened, or eliminated?
6. Which opportunities are worth pursuing?
7. Which opportunities are dependent on something else?
8. Which opportunities should be backburnered?
9. What threats are real problems and what threats are minor?
10. How can those threats be resolved or eliminated?

Lastly, you need to create an action plan from the SWOT analysis, drawing on actionable tasks that need to take place to turn those earlier theoretical connections into reality.

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When that happens, it’s easy to get stressed out and to become overwhelmed. In fact, many people ironically procrastinate when they are too busy. It’s not that they are lazy; it’s usually because they don’t know where to start! In this blog, I’ll list a number of ideas that you can use to help you manage your business (and your sanity) when things go crazy.

1. List everything but don’t prioritize yet. Go for a 5 minute walk – just a mental break. Let your subconscious work for you while you’re thinking about something else momentarily.

2. Come back to your desk and prioritize your work. I can’t write much here about that because everyone’s priorities will be just a little different; but in general, give them priorities A, B, and C. As a coach, it’s likely that your schedule is more than a list but also includes daily appointments that are revenue generators. So those are "A" priority but time-specific.

3. Look at all of your "A" priority work that isn’t time specific. You probably have a long list. Pick something that will be fast to do and do it first. Then, pick something that is the next fasted to do and do it next. Then pick something else that is third fastest to do and do it. The purpose of this action is to start generating some action on your list of work. If you can develop a critical mass then you’ll find procrastination much harder to do and your productivity will rise.

4. Set goals for yourself periodically through the day. When you reach that goal, go take a break.

5. If your list is really long and still overwhelming, try asking yourself this question: "I’m feeling stressed now about my high amount of to-dos. At what point will I feel like I’m on top of my workload?". Rarely is it when everything is crossed off your list. More often, it has to do with capturing a bit of down time.

While you’re working on this list, keep a piece of paper beside you where you can capture any ideas or thoughts that come to mind while you’re working. On other days you can follow these rabbit trails but on busy days you can just write them down to get them off of your mind.

You’ll also want to make sure that you eat a balanced meal and that you’re rested. If you need a short nap, there’s a chance that you’ll actually get more done if you take the nap then come back than if you try to push through your fatigue.

A hectic schedule is not pleasant! It can stress you out and rob you of your effectiveness. But if you follow these steps, you’ll be more likely to keep your sanity and get back on top of your game quickly.

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To do this, we need to move past the surface issues and get to the real root causes of the issues. Here are some questions to help you do that. (Note, since there are many different kinds of coaches, we’ve tried to include fairly generic questions that can be switched from one coaching topic to another, but not all of these questions will be easily "transferable" and you might need to do some customization to make them work.

Question 1: "Tell me about the result that occurs when you perform that activity… and tell me about how you would prefer it to be."

This question is good for a number of different coaching topics and industries. This question helps to explore the gap between intention and result. Your job, then, is to identify the elements in the gap and help your client to solve them. An example of use might be when someone asks you to help them improve their sales because they can’t convert their prospects.

Question 2: "Talk me through a typical process with particular emphasis on what you’re thinking about during that time."

This question might seem a little more like a psychologist’s question but the purpose here is to help you identify incorrect thinking (or distraction or procrastination) during various activities. You might need to work with the person to actually perform the activity. An example of use might be someone who comes to you because they have procrastination issues or are pulled in many different directions.

Question 3: (Part A) "In a perfect world, what would your business look like?" (Part b) "How would this activity impact it?"

The "part A" of this question prompts your client to think revisit their long term vision for the company (or begin to articulate it if they have not done so in a while). The "part B" of this question is much more specific to the project or situation you are coaching them through. It ties your client’s current coached activity to their long-term vision (or highlights if there is not a fit).

Question 4: "Put yourself in your customer’s shoes for a moment and describe how they perceive this aspect of your business."

This question, which is for business-related coaches, obviously, prompts a client to get out of their own narrow mindset that has probably shaped their thinking for too long and to start thinking about their customers. This is also a good question to ask about vendors and employees, too, if that is the area you are coaching them on.

Question 5: "If you were to suddenly receive unlimited funds and time but could ONLY apply it to this situation, what would you do?"

This question helps you to prompt your clients to think about where they should be really investing their resources in a given situation. For example, business owners on a budget might not always invest in the right things or the best things because they focus on the cheapest option. This question helps to draw out what they feel the better investment is.

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