Why firing your clients is not such a bad thing
It would be great if we got along with everybody all of the time. But it doesn’t happen. If you watch the TV show "The Office", you might have seen the recent episodes in which Jim tries to get along with his (temporary) new boss Charles. In spite of his best efforts, he cannot win Charles’ admiration.
I love that storyline because it resonates so well with most of us: There are people in our lives that we just can’t seem to "gel" with: Communication is just off. Misunderstandings are common. Things in general are in discord. It’s like oil and water – it just doesn’t mix.
In your social life, you tend to avoid those people easily (and don’t worry, they’re avoiding you, too) because the rapport isn’t there. But it’s harder to do that in the business world because sometimes those people are your paying clients.
I had just such a client last year. He was a nice enough guy. We started off on the right foot. But it became evident quickly that this was one of those occasions when, in spite of our mutual best efforts, things weren’t going well. There was nothing specific, which is what makes these kinds of relationships so difficult to identify and do something about. But we just had a hard time communicating.
One of us would say something, the other wouldn’t completely understand, and we’d end up down a rabbit-trail of explanation and clarification. Or he might have some expectations and I might have others and they just weren’t parallel, but slightly askew.
After a while I finally did the right thing and told him that we needed to end our arrangement. He asked why and I told him that, after doing this for many years, I’ve come to discover exactly when coach-client relationships work out and when they don’t and this was a case where it wasn’t. He didn’t seem disappointed.
I know you have those occasions, too. It might not be a client; it could be a vendor or a colleague or a business partner or your receptionist or an industry contact. Here are some ways to identify when you’re in that situation:
- You procrastinate calling them, every single time.
- Your instincts tell you that something is not right. (Trust your instincts!)
- Every conversation lasting 10 minutes or more contains at least one of you asking the other what you meant by something.
- Unidentifiable elements of their personality annoy you. (You think it’s their voice but it probably isn’t).
- When the phone rings and you pick it up and it’s them, your heart sinks a little.
Yes, I know that you have at least one person in mind right now who fits those qualities!
Now here is what to do about it:
Fire them.
Plain and simple. That’s what needs to happen. They are like poison in your life. It’s nothing personal, and you can "fire" them professionally and in good taste, but it needs to happen. You need to get those people out of your life or you will stop enjoying what you do and you will come to dread the days you have to work with them.
Although ending a relationship like this doesn’t seem like a good thing to do, consider that these few minutes of pain and awkwardness might seem greater than your regular contact with the person, but it will all be over when you’re done… like pulling a bandage off very quickly.
To fire them graciously and professionally, don’t lie; don’t be afraid to tell them how important it is that you connect with every person you work with and you don’t sense the connection. Chances are, they won’t as well. If they push back and insist that there is a connection, don’t back down. Just keep in mind how better you’ll feel when you’re done with them. Remember, the best thing to do in any given situation is rarely the easiest thing to do. And you will be doing yourself a favor, and because you will begin to enjoy every day again, you’ll also be doing your family and friends and coworkers and clients a favor, too.
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[...] And, you may recall that we recently wrote about firing customers and strongly recommended that you follow your instincts about which customers to keep and which ones to let go. [...]